Posts Tagged "codependency"

Are You In A Controlling Relationship?

Posted by on Jan 11, 2012 in Blog | 0 comments

Are You In A Controlling Relationship?

You might have a picture of what a controlling relationship looks like. However there are many hidden, and often missed signs of control that can cause you to feel like a prisoner to your own actions. Controlling relationships don’t  have to include someone determining what you wear, eat, weigh, or who you can spend time with, there are other signs. It doesn’t have to include checking Internet or phone call histories, stopping by where your partner said they were just to make sure, or enforcing a curfew for your adult partner. Before we get into different signs of control it is...

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What Does It Mean to Be Reactive? Can Counseling Help?

Posted by on Dec 28, 2011 in Blog | 0 comments

What Does It Mean to Be Reactive? Can Counseling Help?

No one likes to be told they are reactive. But hearing it for the first time is especially difficult and confusing. What does it mean to be reactive? Being reactive is what it sounds like, reacting. What your friends or partner may be telling you or what you suspect on your own is that you may have the tendency to react to someone’s words or actions quickly, without thought, in a defensive manner. For example, something you might have said when someone told you that they think you are reactive is ” I am not reactive!” or “You’re the one that’s...

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Boundaries – What are they and why do you need them?

Posted by on Nov 17, 2011 in Blog | 0 comments

Boundaries – What are they and why do you need them?

Sometimes people find themselves bending over backwards for others and then experience resentment towards that person. The truth is when we choose to step over our own boundaries, it is nobody’s fault but our own. Having healthy boundaries can help you maintain your inner peace when the outside may be full of turmoil and uncertainty. Boundaries will help you express what you will accept from others, in terms of behavior. For example if someone calls you a name and you do not draw the line that calling you a name is unacceptable then you have put that “in bounds”, or ok for...

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3 Strategies to Let Go of Control

Posted by on Oct 31, 2011 in Blog | 0 comments

3 Strategies to Let Go of Control

Letting go is kind of like floating on a river. Life is the river, it has direction, current, and flow. Sometimes its bumpy and sometimes it is smooth. Imagine you are a leaf and the river is pulling you along with it. You can either hold on to every rock or branch that you pass trying to hang on and control how fast you float down the river or you can let go and let it take you where it will anyway. As a continuation of the previous blog, “Learn how to control the one person you can, you”, I have identified 3 strategies to shift your focus or control from others onto you; ways...

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Accepting Control Over the One Person You Can…You!

Posted by on Oct 24, 2011 in Blog | 0 comments

Accepting Control Over the One Person You Can…You!

Some of the best words I ever learned were: You can’t change others, only yourself. Another way I have heard this is: You can’t change others, just your reaction to them. There are two ways to control. One in which you try to control everything around the people in your life in hopes for making them think, feel, or act differently.  The other way is to try to actually get the other person to change the person they are so they can be who you want them to be. How many times have you tried, with no avail, to get someone to notice you, to make it easy for them to like you, spend time...

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